Fave Quotes

“The scariest moment is always just before you start.”  Stephen King

“People cannot live unless they’re needed by others. Therefore, they work so hard; for their jobs, or studies..in order to be needed by someone.” — Aizawa Kousaku, Code Blue

“I won’t cast the first stone or leave the first mark, but I will leave a lasting impression.”New Found Glory, Failure’s Not Flattering

“Orang-orang yang merindu, namun tetap menjaga kehormatan perasaannya, takut sekali berbuat dosa, memilih senyap, terus memperbaiki diri hingga waktu memberikan kabar baik, boleh jadi doa-doanya menguntai tangga yang indah hingga ke langit. Kalaupun tidak dengan yang dirindukan, boleh jadi diganti yang lebih baik”  Tere Liye

“If you argue correctly, you’re never wrong. That’s the beauty of argument.”  Nick Naylor, Thank You For Smoking.

“You’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think!”  Christopher Robin, Winnie the Pooh’s Most Grand Adventure.

“Kemiskinan itu bukan berarti tidak memiliki apa-apa akan tetapi ketidakmampuan untuk mengelola sumber daya yang ada.”  Erie Sudewo, Chairman of Dompet Dhuafa.

“Sometimes in life there really are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes, you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what. Maybe you’ll find it in a spouse and celebrate it in your dream wedding. But there’s also the chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime, the one person who knows you –sometimes better than you know yourself, is the same person who’s been standing beside you all along.” — Marion St. Claire, Bride Wars.

When does a human die? It’s when he’s forgotten by others..”— Dr. Hiluluk, One Piece.

“When alone, people don’t value life. It’s only when there’s someone they want to be with, someone they don’t want to sadden, people value their own lives.” —  Aizawa Kousaku, Code Blue.

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Meeting Your 10-Years-Old Self: Evaluation on Life

A feew weeks ago, I saw this #komik10tahun on Instagram and it sort of went viral among comic artists. There were many inspiring stories of how they imagine themselves meeting their 10-years-old self.

These stories inspired me to do an activity with my students.
I shared with my students about how most people actually “plan their lives” when they’re 10 years old. Not in high school. Not in college. Your real dreams and ambitions are created when you’re 10 years old.

It’s a prime age where dreams and imaginations start to meet the real world.

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It’s That Time of The Year Again, I Guess..

Yep, being the seasonal blogger I am, you know what it means when I suddenly show up on this blog again.

Gosh, it’s been almost a year since my last post, huh? Can’t believe time went by that fast.

Ah, I don’t know where to start..

The last one year has been such a roller-coaster of emotions for me. Oh, and I (almost) fell into depression (again). Yup, it’s been one helluva year. I survived that, though, and I began to love my job more than I ever loved anything I’ve ever done in my life.

But maybe.. I’ve fallen in love too deeply. And nothing with the prefix ‘too’ has ever gone good. I know I’ve always told myself to not care about what people say, as long as do what I believe is right.. But well, apparently letting your heart take control is not all that good after all.

I let my heart lead the way, but apparently I ignored my logic completely.. and I almost ruined everything.

I’m in too deep.

I don’t know why this always happens to me.  The moment I care, I ruin everything.

Because I’d do it wholeheartedly. I’d care too much.

And I ruined it. Again.

I might need to pull myself away for now. Keep my distance. Try to care less.

Thank goodness I have somewhere else to put my focus on..

“I can’t help you fix yourself
But at least I can say I tried
I’m sorry but I gotta move on with my own life

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel..”

– Papa Roach, ‘Scars’

____

I have other news that might be more exciting to share, but.. in another post, maybe. Right now I’m just too mellow to write anything else..

But hey! Thank goodness for all those mellow-ness. Here I am writing again. Guess there’s always a brighter side to everything…

Surviving (Near-)Depression and Building Something Meaningful

I’m baaaack! (Yeah, well, you know the drill. As usual, I’m such a seasonal blogger.)

The last few months hasn’t been great for me actually. I almost fell into depression, if not actually depressed. And the last post about a place I belong? Boy how I was so wrong. Sekolah Alam is only great from the outside, but inside, it’s just as conventional as the school next door. At least that’s what I can say, based on my own experience. Not to belittle other Sekolah Alam, though.

Anyway, so now I’ve left the job at Sekolah Alam. I’m not proud of how I did, but I’m kinda glad I made the decision. I did went through terrible time after I resigned, I was in a very low point in the last few months, as if I didn’t know how to live anymore (yes, it was that bad)..but somehow I was able to pull myself back up. All praise to Allah, Alhamdulillah. And I finally figured out what I’m meant to do, or at least, what I really aspire to do.

Currently I’m back teaching as a freelance, looking for a suitable teaching job in alternative schools, and building networks in education. Last month I went to #PestaPendidikan in Bandung, and also joined Fitrah Based Education workshop. They were very insightful. I realized that what I enjoy the most is learning, and I’m always excited to learn, be it through seminars and workshop, or through interacting with people. I like talking about and spreading ideas, and get very excited when the people I talk to share the similar ideas.

Now I’m very excited to build @sekolahparenting, as a fitrah based education community. (Please do join! Any parents, parents to-be, educators or anyone who wants to learn and share about parenting are very welcomed.) Later when the community is solid, I think it’ll be much easier to build and develop a fitrah based school together. I’m very optimistic on this. Bismillah, I hope Allah Gives blessing on this plan.

It’s still a long way to go, but I think it’s gonna be an interesting journey.. Let’s collaborate! :)

The Place I Belong

OneRepublic - Counting Stars. Play video for lyrics.

I just re-listened to this song thoroughly today, and realized that this is the theme song to my career turning point :)

Yes, I feel like I’ve given up a lot for the work I’m doing right now, but I think it’s totally worth it. I feel like I’m where I’m supposed to be. I’m in the best job I can possibly be in :)

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Indonesia

Aku ingin hidup normal, katanya

Perlu kau tanya kenapa?

Entah apa yang dirasa normal baginya

Tapi ia pernah berkata

Nama itu terlalu berat dipikulnya

Entah kapan ia terakhir merasa bahagia

Kusangka setelah ia menemukan kawan perjalanannya

Ia akhirnya akan bahagia

Namun ternyata terus begitu sendu hatinya

Entah mengapa

 

Mungkin aku memang bukan siapa-siapa baginya

Mungkin aku tak punya tempat lagi di sana

Tapi sungguh ku hanya ingin yang terbaik baginya

Sungguh ku selalu ingin hadir untuk dirinya

Apa yang bisa kulakukan untuknya?

Ketika ia seperti tak ingin mendengar apapun selain isi pikirannya

Bagaimana aku bisa membantunya?

Ketika ia sepertinya sudah menyerah untuk bahagia?

Jakarta, 11 September 2016.